Irish Republicanism - dead or just in hibernation?

Do you have any republican sympathies? Perhaps your family came from Ireland originally and you have quite strong views about the peace process? Are you a Republican or a Nationalist? Do you know the difference?

I was out tonight for the first time in quite a while for nothing but a drink in a local pub. It suddenly became obvious that the singer hired for the night was a republican. Ok, fine. I have a lot of sympathies with the problems that have been encountered with the fight for a united Ireland over the years. The act began with a couple of republican songs that I knew well and I didn't mind, however the songs became more and more bigoted and I started to feel uncomfortable. Then I realised the reason. Republicanism, as it was, a branch of extremist feeling that had ended in so many lives being lost on both sides of the Irish divide, should in this day and age be dead. But it isn't.

The marching season has just begun in the North and already there are injuries and riots and fights. No-one has looked at the historical background for any of these and called a halt saying, "perhaps in the 21st century we can find a solution!"

No-one had said, "perhaps our children are more important that bigotry?"

Unionism is to blame as much as Republicanism. It is EXTREMISM on both sides that has caused the problem.

Does no one remember the days of Apartheid in South Africa? Perhaps things seemed more "black and white"? (no pun intended) Perhaps everyone should look at the children in various parts of the planet and suddenly realise that prejudice of any sort damages a community.

Perhaps we should all realise that we actually should all want the same thing - not division - but unity and peace. Perhaps we should all just cop ourselves on!

Big is NOT beautiful!

Under Drs orders I have now embarked on another diet! I seriously need to lose about 7 stone. But I have set my target at 5 stone for now. (For those of you across the pond a stone equals 14 pounds). Yes, and before you say it - I know - I'm grossly overweight and I need to cop myself on! Well I think I have this time. I don't want to be a middle aged fat woman whilst I'm in my thirties! I'm still young and I still want to feel young and look young.

I am increasingly annoyed by the "big is beautiful" campaign. I am big, and even though I know that beauty comes from within and that people shouldn't judge by appearances, its not about OTHER people! Its about how I feel about myself! When I'm overweight, I don't feel beautiful, I don't move beautifully and I sure as hell don't look attractive in the clothes I wear. Now I know that there are those of you out there who will immediately try and shoot me down for being so negative. But perhaps we all need to be honest and say that being FAT is NEGATIVE! The majority of people do not have a medical reason for being overweight and the only reason they are overweight is because they overeat. I hold my hands up and say - this is me! And every other fat person out there should stop making excuses and admit to this as well.

It doesn't matter how many people try and bully us into believing that its okay to be fat, at the end of the day, its not okay. You increase the risk of heart disease, stroke, hardening of the arteries, cancer and numerous other diseases. This isn't scare tactics by the diet industry, this is medical fact! We all know that smoking is bad for us - even those who don't want to give up know its not doing them any good. Well being overweight is exactly the same. It is BAD for us! It will make us ILL. Just because you don't want to be bothered to lose weight and you don't care that you might get ill doesn't make the risks any less. Its not a choice that your body makes, it doesn't say - well my owner thinks its okay to be fat so I don't need to get any fat related illnesses! Please - wake up and smell the coffee!

I've suddenly realised that no-one will help me and no-one will do this for me. I need to do this for MYSELF! I have to WANT to do this. I gave up smoking a year ago when I realised the same thing. And now I am applying the same philosophy to losing weight.

I have already lost one stone (14 pounds) and am fitting into a smaller pair of jeans. I am still very overweight but I feel so much better in myself for a couple of reasons:

• I am eating less and this in itself is preventing me feeling bloated and tired
• I am already able to move more freely because of having lost a small amount
• Psychologically I feel fantastic, because I am finally in control of the way I look

I don't have unrealistic goals. I don't expect to be wearing a bikini in the next few weeks. I just want to take control of my life and become a young woman again, not a young woman in an old woman's body!

An update for you: I have now lost 4 stone and I'm looking great! I'm ahead of target!

Is Yours an Honest Babysitter?

If you are a parent, you will know just how difficult it is to find a responsible babysitter who will respect your house and that you can trust your kids with. If you're like me, you have been through several avenues in order to find one. Firstly, I would like to say that I found one fantastic babysitter who is 15 and with whom we have had no problems. She is lovely and responsible and we're so glad we found her!

However, I thought that I needed a back up babysitter. I knew that at some point my regular babysitter would be doing exams, or needing to compete in sporting events, etc. So I thought it best to find an alternative that I could use in this event. Oh boy was I lead a merry dance! I advertised on the internet (the responses that I had never actually turned up for appointments that were made). I asked everyone I knew. And then, I advertised in the shops in town for a local person who was responsible and experienced in babysitting. One person didn't show up - am I getting old, but does no-one feel the need to be courteous and let you know if they can't make it anymore these days?

Then I got a reply from my ad in town from a 19 year old who had done babysitting for the local hotel. I arranged to meet her and she turned up for the appointment on time and looking keen. She gave me a reference and I told her that we would arrange for her to babysit in a couple of weeks. I was feeling very pleased with myself for having finally got my "spare" babysitter! I should not have relaxed!

I telephoned the hotel and spoke with the manager who gave her a good reference and also said that her mother worked at the hotel and was a good worker too. I was happy, but there was one mistake that I made that I will elaborate on in a minute. She arrived to babysit as arranged and on time. I showed her how to use our telephone and showed her the two mobile numbers that my husband and I could be called on if she needed to contact us.

We went out, had a lovely meal and were back quite early. I dropped her back home in my car and paid her for her time. Everything seemed fine. I checked on the children and was unhappy to see my 2 and a half year old outside of the covers which indicated to me she hadn't checked on him as instructed (once you cover him up again - he stays like that until morning!) But I was prepared to let it drop and just impress on her the need to check on them next time she came to us.

Later the next day, I went to use the telephone. Our telephone is a cordless model that stores previously dialled numbers on it, like a mobile. I scrolled through the previously dialled numbers as I wanted to phone my father in the UK and knew I had dialled his number the day before. I was horrified to see a load of numbers that were not dialled by me. I checked with my husband who confirmed he hadn't used the phone at all the day before. I saw that out of six unknown numbers one was an international mobile number. I contacted my phone company who told me the time of the calls and the cost came to approximately 7Euros.

I immediately phoned the babysitter who said she had been meaning to tell me... oh and the other excuse was that she had called the numbers by accident, she hadn't meant to, blah blah blah. I told her in no uncertain terms that if I couldn't trust her with my telephone, I couldn't trust her with my kids and that I now have no idea what she was up to in my house whilst I was out. She could have had her boyfriend round or anything. I told her she had messed up what could have been quite a cushy number for her as we pay higher than most for a babysitter. We weren't going to use her again and I would not be keeping quiet about what she had done.

Perhaps it seems that I overreacted to a few phone calls. Perhaps you would have dealt with this differently. However, my children are my life. It is so difficult for parents to trust people these days with the horrible things happening all over the world to children. I need to know that I can trust my babysitter with my childrens lives and welfare for the few hours they are in their care. If I lose trust in one aspect, I lose all trust.

The one mistake I made when checking out her references was that I didn't check with the Gardai. I have now heard that both her and her family have been in trouble with the police before. In future, I will be phoning the Gardai first, before any other reference I am given. I just thank God that my kids are okay and it was only a few euros that she took.

Take this as a cautionary tale and do your homework...